A christening checklist

A Romanian christening (botez) is usually prepared in six to eight weeks, and it has one peculiarity: the work is shared between two families, the parents’ and the godparents’. Most muddles arise when each believes the other is taking care of something. The list below says plainly who does what — and if your custom differs, swap the roles, but write them down.

Six to eight weeks ahead

• Speak to the priest: the date, the time and which papers are needed. The child’s birth certificate is normally required; the rest varies from parish to parish, so ask.
• Choose the godparents and agree together, without hedging, what each family buys.
• Book the restaurant or decide to hold the meal at home. For a lunchtime christening, small rooms fill quickly.
• Draw up the guest list by household, with a number of adults and a number of children.

What the godparents usually prepare

• the trousseau: the christening cloth (crijma), towels, soap, oil and a small bottle for the chrism, as the parish asks;
• the decorated christening candle;
• the clothes the child wears after the ceremony;
• a small cross, where that is the custom.

What the parents usually prepare

• the meal: menu, cake, drinks, with an option for children;
• the keepsakes (mărturii) for guests;
• the photographer — ask beforehand whether flash is allowed in the church;
• a quiet corner for the child at the restaurant: pram, a change of clothes, everything for feeding.

Two weeks ahead

Ask for confirmations and give the restaurant the final number, with the high chairs needed. Fit the time of the meal around the child’s sleep, not the reverse: a midday service followed directly by lunch usually proves easier than an evening one. Decide who takes the trousseau to church and who stays with the child while photographs are taken.

On the day

• Arrive at church a quarter of an hour early, with the papers and the trousseau in a single bag.
• Bring a spare set of clothes for the child, and one for whoever holds them.
• Ask someone in the family to welcome guests at the restaurant until you arrive.

A good christening is a short one: the child will not remember the party, but will feel it if it runs too long.